WOW!! last night and 2day God did some really awesome stuff in my life. I went to the Ember Days/Ester Lyn concert (another guy sang...agh cant remember his name right now!). At ember days as jason and janell sang, i felt this childlikenes and this hunger for God stir up in me...deep weeping from the inside began to come out of me...healing and hunger mixed...the Presence of God showed up! Then the band Ester Lyn began to talk about a chinese orphan and orphans all around the world, and Josh and I were weeping...God began to stir up in us a supernatural compassion for the poor, children and the hurting. as this was happening, we had been dancing with a bunch of little kids by the stage. It was so beautiful!!! God's saying He's making us more childlike in worship. Also, we're going to be working with kids alot. In the concert, a little girl got healed of knee problem and some people who had unforgiveness got freedom. PTL!
Then this afternoon, HEIDI BakeR spoke at our school, bethel, to us the first year students. It was so powerful. What God had started in me (the deep weeping and stuff) continued during worship today and throughout her message. She said angels were coming in the room giving us blueprints for our destiny. At the same time, Josh and I knew we were going home after 1st year and God was going to begin to launch us into our destiny!! I was weeping on the floor as He showed me this and saw a scroll which the angel handed to me.
Then, the whole message was on John 15, about how God wants us to spend more time with Him--it is ONLY out of intimacy with Him that we are fruitful! If satan cant get us to fall morally, he will try to get us too busy for intimacy with God until were sick of doing ministry and turn and go the wrong way. This is SOOO basic yet SOO true!
She talked about how Gods wants people to be married to one person all their lives (God hates divorce, adultery etc!!!! YUCK!). God wants people not just in signs and wonders but character. She also said God is uniting the body of Christ, people from many different denominations etc God wants to bring together....
Also, she said God is a good father and wants to give us big things. So we need to ASK BIIIIGGGG!!!!! She said she asked for a nation and God gave it to her...she asked to be the most loving wife and mother on the planet...what are you asking for???
Then she had us all pray for each other, for whatever destiny was on our lives. i am called to media stuff,partly, like writing, music, etc so people pr'yd for me and i was crying again...totally wrecked by God and the incredible plan he has on me. then she had all the people who were called to the poor orphans, missions, etc. to kneel. josh and i did...once again weeping. God is doing so much in us and imparting so much to us! I just love HIM and all I wanna do is glorify Him with my life and live to KNOW and BE KNOWN by HIM, growing in love, power, character, and glory!!!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Monday, April 12, 2010
thoughts on my life and my marriage...
God is so good! Josh and I have been married for 2.5 years now...almost 3! And I have known Joshua my husband for almost 4 years :-)! We have an amazing story of how we came together! We're now currently living in Redding, CA going to the Bethel Supernatural School of Ministry...so what have I been learning?
1. The #1 thing I have learned the most here is my identity in Christ. The blood of Jesus made me a new creation. I am a child, an heir of everything in God's kingdom. I am totally pure and righteous. I am seated in heavenly places and have all authority over evil and can change circumstances as I speak life over them. I am a Royal Daughter, a true Princess/Queen! Becaese of and by the blood of Jesus, I have access to run into my Daddy's arms and ask Him anything I need to anytime I need to...because I am now His. I am his honey, his beloved daughter and He dotes on me! He cares about everything I care about, and hears and answers every prayer, every requests, and gives me all I need and grants all my desires as I delight in Him! He gives me every request prayed in faith! Its amazing! He's such a GOOD GOOD DADDY!!!
2. The next biggest thing is that God's teaching me many truths about my marriage and how to be a wife. I am really learning how to be a godly wife!! It's awesome and I love it! Everything taught to me by the Holy Spirit the previous two years has been tested here, and it's now going from head knowledge to heart knowledge! Here are some truths He's been showing me the last 3.5 years:
a.when we call out to Him for help in regards to him leading us and giving us willing hearts to go HIS way, He will. Yes, He led me to marry Josh!! I love our marriage! Every part of it is miraculous!!! It would take forever to explain why but...that'll take too long :-) Also, when we cry out for him to help us and how us how to be wives to our hubbies, he WILL show us and give us the strength we need!!! It all comes from him...cry out when it seems impossible!!!
b. some secrets on being a wife: (I did not always learn this the easy way!!!!)
1. dont entertain anything negative about your husband or marriage or people around you. Those negative thoughts are intended to bring death, i.e discouragement to you and your hubby, and divide the both of you. Division is NEVER God. Unity is...So focus on the good things God is doing. Focus on the good traits God's put in your husband, whether giftings, physical, spiritual..anything good you can find!!!!! Choose to respect your husband. Cry out to God for help to do so. Then, thank God for those things. Hold on to those things and give Him the bad stuff. Cast down the negative and replace it with positive. Praise Him. Stay in a spirit of praise.
2. Speak only good things to your husband. No complaining, that's just focusing back on the devil and yourself more than serving and glorifying what Gods doing. The devil would love to get you to exalt what hes doing. DONT DO IT!!! Instead, Praise your husband when he does good things, amazing things, etc. Tell him the good things you're thinking about him. Show him you respect him by the words of praise and encouragement that come from your mouth. Speak good about your life, what God's doing, the people around the both of you, everything good you can. Speak LIFE not death. What you focus on, you empower. It WILL get bigger. As you focus on the good in your hubby, it will grow and the bad stuff will begin to fall away.
3. Arguing is not from God. Arguing comes from asserting your own way instead of laying down your life for the other person. It also can come from control, which is based on fear. Submit to your husband, do what he wants to do. In doing this you show respect for him, show that you believe he has what it takes to be the leader, and you trust his decisions, you like his ideas. As you submit to him, and dont try to manipulate him or control him, you are obeying Gods word, and you will find he will want to lay down his life for you, and WILL begin doing what you want, too. Good seeds in your hubby WILL bear good fruit. Be patient!
4. God wants man and wife to be one. Division and divorce is NEVER Him. Unity is. The bible says that when we are one, the world will know Jesus is who He says He is! Our love and unity WILL get people saved!!! so if you think arguing with your hubby is no big deal, IT IS!!! little things like how to make the bed or what color to paint the walls...you can submit to him in that, with Gods help. and you will see that he'll want to do things more and more your way, too... :-)
5. There are times to not submit to your hubby--only if what he's doing/wants you to do is completely contrary to God's word AND is a life and death issue. Cry out to God for courage and strength, and speak to him out of love, respect, and gentleness. It should sound like a gentle and loving appeal, cuz that's the way the Holy Spirit treats us. This is how we should treat our hubbies!!! This is not a license to disobey Gods word. God's Word clearly in 1 Pe 3 says for us not to preach at our hubbies. In other words, If our hubbies disobey God's word, were not to be their conscience. We're to pray for them and focus on what WE need to do right before pointing out their wrongs. But I believe if it involves a life and death issue, which would cause us to sin, we are to speak out in an appeal. But if its done in anger, rebellion or control, youre not following God and your hubby probably wont feel respected so wont listen. Once you've developed a pattern of submission, love, honor, esteem and respect for your husband, he will be ready listen to your heart cries over moral issues!!!
6. Live in a LIFESTYLE of forgiveness. Know you are just as capable of every sin your husband has done, and probably have done worse things to him than he has to you!! WALK in a lifestyle of repentance. SAY sorry immediately...ask God for the grace for you guys to walk in forgiveness and repentance.
7. Second-guessing your marriage is NEVER God. it is EXTREMELY demonic, and these thoughts are lies--demons from satan intended to divide you, to end your marriage. Cast these thoughts down. It is God's PERFECT will for you to be married to your husband. Believing I'm supposed to be married to Josh is the "8-BALL" of truth I am to hold on to! No matter what the situation is, He has a BEAUTIFUL glorious and HEAVENLY plan for you! The Bible shows us we need to stay anchored in HOPE and rooted and grounded in LOVE for our spouse. All mistakes, HE HAS washed under the blood!!!
8. Talk and reminisce about the good times! Focus on those amazing times. However, The things your husband has already repented of, DONT drag them out of the past and remind him of them...forgive quickly and stay in forgiveness, see your husband through the blood of Jesus...do what Jesus does: He washed him clean and obliterated the sins with His blood. These things are under the blood and reminding him of his past sins is partnering with the accuser of the brethren, Satan, and making your hub by focus on them (which may lead to it happening again!)!
9. Tell your hubby why you married him in the first place...what attracted u to him?
10. Make declarations/pray over your marriage every day that lines up with the Word (For example, I declare that/ask you God today that today Josh and I would be anchored in Hope and Rooted and Grounded in Love and that we would have an Ephesians 5 marriage!!!) !!
11. Pray for your husband daily but DOnT let the enemy use this to get oyu focused on his mistakes!
12. Give and talk to Daddy God about your hurts, ask him to heal your heart! And ask Him for wisdom daily! Ask God for help all the time!!! Stay dependant on Him knowing you cant do anything without Him!!! Cry out, He will save!!!
13. Renounce fear, daily if necessary. God doesn't want us to submit out of fear or do ANYTHING else out of fear. Fear of man doesnt produce the fruit God wants in our marriages or any relationships. That will only produce resentment. Truly serving your husband out of a heart of love is way more fruitful, Ask God to help you recognize when its fear and RESIST FEAR. Make sure its out of LOVE always!
Josh and I were really blessed to spend a 4 day, 3 night vacation at the Gold Bluffs beach campground in Orick, CA, right where the famous Redwoods are. God put it on Josh's heart 2 take me there. It was SOOO perfect. It was there that I put the above
truths into practice, and we saw these truths bear amazing fruit....
**my identity...I declared from my authority as a Queen that that there would be good weather. There had been forecasted bad weather. For the days we stayed there, we had good weather. The ranger spoke with us and was amazed that we had timed it so well. Most of the time, the weather is rainy or foggy, even in the summer. The before we came and the day we left was cloudy/rainy. When we got there, we kept telling the clouds to leave. After a couple hours, they DID and we had a clear starry sky that night and lots of sun that day! Also, we commanded the wind to die down. After a couple hours or so, IT DID! The guy camping close to us said he was so glad it did. Josh was able to tell both the ranger and the guy camping that we had PRAYED.
I prayed to find a whole (not broken) sand dollar, and Josh found one!! Josh prayed to see a seal pup, and he did! Its cute little head popped up right in front of where we were by the ocean!
Josh and I had our first date on 7.21.06 and our wedding on 7.21.07...the number 7, which means perfection, has been a huge part of our marriage...while on our trip we found 77 cents in pennies dimes and quarter!! haha!!! how cool of God!
God spoke to me about HIs love as i sat by the ocean...He is like the ocean. We can throw our troubles and cares and sins into the vastness of His love, and HE WILL COVER THEM, SWaLlOW THEM aLL UP with HIS AMAZING LOVE!!! His love is SO GREAT it will swallow up every bad thing and still love us MORE AND MORE!!!! God showed Josh as he found a starfish, driftwood, and other ocean treasures, that HIS WORD is like the ocean...it is full of treasures, and He is just waiting to take us "exploring" deeper into His Word!!
Also, after I had read about Jesus' prayer that we would be one so the world would believe in Jesus, three birds flew over the ocean, all in perfect unity...I felt God was saying its Josh, me and Jesus!! We need to stay in unity with each other and Jesus.
Without realizing it, I had made footprints of a figure 8 while praying..then right after that I turned in the Bible to Acts 8:8 which said "and their was great joy in that city"...the verse before explains how God was setting people free. God is setting Josh and I free of lies, and we will have great joy as a result!!! Also, 8 is the number of new beginnings!!! YAY!!!
The whole time was beautiful...we camped right by the ocean but were nestled behind some trees to keep us warm from the wind coming from the ocean, perfect campsite!! took lots of walks there, ran through the waves crashing in (Josh took a dive..me--no thanks! too cold! haha)..had lots of warm fires and cooked our food over it..played guitar by the fire under the stars...
we hiked in Fern Canyon--it was like a fairy world!! and we took a 6-mile hike in the beautiful Redwood forest, i felt like i had shrunk!!! While hiking, we prayed that we could be strong, stedfast, enduring like these gigantic, beautiful Redwoods (some were 2,000 years old!!!! WOW!!! without dying!). We wondered, what is the secret of the Redwoods? We found out from reading our handout that they ENTERTWINE THEIR ROOTS to other trees around them, and gather strength from them. GOd spoke to us so powerfully through this!!! Josh and I need each other! Spouses need each other if they want to be strong and enduring!! Also, we need the body of Christ!!
While on the trip, I found myself developing a pattern on submission, love, respect and speaking only words of life over Josh. We talked and reminisced over the good times we've had since knowing each other..I told him why I married him...the real reasons why he's so amazing to me...we were crying...it was beautiful!!
The fruit of all this was wonderful and amazing....Josh told me that it was the best time he's EVER EVER had with me since he's known me!!!! WOW...I only want to grow in this! PTL!!!!
1. The #1 thing I have learned the most here is my identity in Christ. The blood of Jesus made me a new creation. I am a child, an heir of everything in God's kingdom. I am totally pure and righteous. I am seated in heavenly places and have all authority over evil and can change circumstances as I speak life over them. I am a Royal Daughter, a true Princess/Queen! Becaese of and by the blood of Jesus, I have access to run into my Daddy's arms and ask Him anything I need to anytime I need to...because I am now His. I am his honey, his beloved daughter and He dotes on me! He cares about everything I care about, and hears and answers every prayer, every requests, and gives me all I need and grants all my desires as I delight in Him! He gives me every request prayed in faith! Its amazing! He's such a GOOD GOOD DADDY!!!
2. The next biggest thing is that God's teaching me many truths about my marriage and how to be a wife. I am really learning how to be a godly wife!! It's awesome and I love it! Everything taught to me by the Holy Spirit the previous two years has been tested here, and it's now going from head knowledge to heart knowledge! Here are some truths He's been showing me the last 3.5 years:
a.when we call out to Him for help in regards to him leading us and giving us willing hearts to go HIS way, He will. Yes, He led me to marry Josh!! I love our marriage! Every part of it is miraculous!!! It would take forever to explain why but...that'll take too long :-) Also, when we cry out for him to help us and how us how to be wives to our hubbies, he WILL show us and give us the strength we need!!! It all comes from him...cry out when it seems impossible!!!
b. some secrets on being a wife: (I did not always learn this the easy way!!!!)
1. dont entertain anything negative about your husband or marriage or people around you. Those negative thoughts are intended to bring death, i.e discouragement to you and your hubby, and divide the both of you. Division is NEVER God. Unity is...So focus on the good things God is doing. Focus on the good traits God's put in your husband, whether giftings, physical, spiritual..anything good you can find!!!!! Choose to respect your husband. Cry out to God for help to do so. Then, thank God for those things. Hold on to those things and give Him the bad stuff. Cast down the negative and replace it with positive. Praise Him. Stay in a spirit of praise.
2. Speak only good things to your husband. No complaining, that's just focusing back on the devil and yourself more than serving and glorifying what Gods doing. The devil would love to get you to exalt what hes doing. DONT DO IT!!! Instead, Praise your husband when he does good things, amazing things, etc. Tell him the good things you're thinking about him. Show him you respect him by the words of praise and encouragement that come from your mouth. Speak good about your life, what God's doing, the people around the both of you, everything good you can. Speak LIFE not death. What you focus on, you empower. It WILL get bigger. As you focus on the good in your hubby, it will grow and the bad stuff will begin to fall away.
3. Arguing is not from God. Arguing comes from asserting your own way instead of laying down your life for the other person. It also can come from control, which is based on fear. Submit to your husband, do what he wants to do. In doing this you show respect for him, show that you believe he has what it takes to be the leader, and you trust his decisions, you like his ideas. As you submit to him, and dont try to manipulate him or control him, you are obeying Gods word, and you will find he will want to lay down his life for you, and WILL begin doing what you want, too. Good seeds in your hubby WILL bear good fruit. Be patient!
4. God wants man and wife to be one. Division and divorce is NEVER Him. Unity is. The bible says that when we are one, the world will know Jesus is who He says He is! Our love and unity WILL get people saved!!! so if you think arguing with your hubby is no big deal, IT IS!!! little things like how to make the bed or what color to paint the walls...you can submit to him in that, with Gods help. and you will see that he'll want to do things more and more your way, too... :-)
5. There are times to not submit to your hubby--only if what he's doing/wants you to do is completely contrary to God's word AND is a life and death issue. Cry out to God for courage and strength, and speak to him out of love, respect, and gentleness. It should sound like a gentle and loving appeal, cuz that's the way the Holy Spirit treats us. This is how we should treat our hubbies!!! This is not a license to disobey Gods word. God's Word clearly in 1 Pe 3 says for us not to preach at our hubbies. In other words, If our hubbies disobey God's word, were not to be their conscience. We're to pray for them and focus on what WE need to do right before pointing out their wrongs. But I believe if it involves a life and death issue, which would cause us to sin, we are to speak out in an appeal. But if its done in anger, rebellion or control, youre not following God and your hubby probably wont feel respected so wont listen. Once you've developed a pattern of submission, love, honor, esteem and respect for your husband, he will be ready listen to your heart cries over moral issues!!!
6. Live in a LIFESTYLE of forgiveness. Know you are just as capable of every sin your husband has done, and probably have done worse things to him than he has to you!! WALK in a lifestyle of repentance. SAY sorry immediately...ask God for the grace for you guys to walk in forgiveness and repentance.
7. Second-guessing your marriage is NEVER God. it is EXTREMELY demonic, and these thoughts are lies--demons from satan intended to divide you, to end your marriage. Cast these thoughts down. It is God's PERFECT will for you to be married to your husband. Believing I'm supposed to be married to Josh is the "8-BALL" of truth I am to hold on to! No matter what the situation is, He has a BEAUTIFUL glorious and HEAVENLY plan for you! The Bible shows us we need to stay anchored in HOPE and rooted and grounded in LOVE for our spouse. All mistakes, HE HAS washed under the blood!!!
8. Talk and reminisce about the good times! Focus on those amazing times. However, The things your husband has already repented of, DONT drag them out of the past and remind him of them...forgive quickly and stay in forgiveness, see your husband through the blood of Jesus...do what Jesus does: He washed him clean and obliterated the sins with His blood. These things are under the blood and reminding him of his past sins is partnering with the accuser of the brethren, Satan, and making your hub by focus on them (which may lead to it happening again!)!
9. Tell your hubby why you married him in the first place...what attracted u to him?
10. Make declarations/pray over your marriage every day that lines up with the Word (For example, I declare that/ask you God today that today Josh and I would be anchored in Hope and Rooted and Grounded in Love and that we would have an Ephesians 5 marriage!!!) !!
11. Pray for your husband daily but DOnT let the enemy use this to get oyu focused on his mistakes!
12. Give and talk to Daddy God about your hurts, ask him to heal your heart! And ask Him for wisdom daily! Ask God for help all the time!!! Stay dependant on Him knowing you cant do anything without Him!!! Cry out, He will save!!!
13. Renounce fear, daily if necessary. God doesn't want us to submit out of fear or do ANYTHING else out of fear. Fear of man doesnt produce the fruit God wants in our marriages or any relationships. That will only produce resentment. Truly serving your husband out of a heart of love is way more fruitful, Ask God to help you recognize when its fear and RESIST FEAR. Make sure its out of LOVE always!
Josh and I were really blessed to spend a 4 day, 3 night vacation at the Gold Bluffs beach campground in Orick, CA, right where the famous Redwoods are. God put it on Josh's heart 2 take me there. It was SOOO perfect. It was there that I put the above
truths into practice, and we saw these truths bear amazing fruit....
**my identity...I declared from my authority as a Queen that that there would be good weather. There had been forecasted bad weather. For the days we stayed there, we had good weather. The ranger spoke with us and was amazed that we had timed it so well. Most of the time, the weather is rainy or foggy, even in the summer. The before we came and the day we left was cloudy/rainy. When we got there, we kept telling the clouds to leave. After a couple hours, they DID and we had a clear starry sky that night and lots of sun that day! Also, we commanded the wind to die down. After a couple hours or so, IT DID! The guy camping close to us said he was so glad it did. Josh was able to tell both the ranger and the guy camping that we had PRAYED.
I prayed to find a whole (not broken) sand dollar, and Josh found one!! Josh prayed to see a seal pup, and he did! Its cute little head popped up right in front of where we were by the ocean!
Josh and I had our first date on 7.21.06 and our wedding on 7.21.07...the number 7, which means perfection, has been a huge part of our marriage...while on our trip we found 77 cents in pennies dimes and quarter!! haha!!! how cool of God!
God spoke to me about HIs love as i sat by the ocean...He is like the ocean. We can throw our troubles and cares and sins into the vastness of His love, and HE WILL COVER THEM, SWaLlOW THEM aLL UP with HIS AMAZING LOVE!!! His love is SO GREAT it will swallow up every bad thing and still love us MORE AND MORE!!!! God showed Josh as he found a starfish, driftwood, and other ocean treasures, that HIS WORD is like the ocean...it is full of treasures, and He is just waiting to take us "exploring" deeper into His Word!!
Also, after I had read about Jesus' prayer that we would be one so the world would believe in Jesus, three birds flew over the ocean, all in perfect unity...I felt God was saying its Josh, me and Jesus!! We need to stay in unity with each other and Jesus.
Without realizing it, I had made footprints of a figure 8 while praying..then right after that I turned in the Bible to Acts 8:8 which said "and their was great joy in that city"...the verse before explains how God was setting people free. God is setting Josh and I free of lies, and we will have great joy as a result!!! Also, 8 is the number of new beginnings!!! YAY!!!
The whole time was beautiful...we camped right by the ocean but were nestled behind some trees to keep us warm from the wind coming from the ocean, perfect campsite!! took lots of walks there, ran through the waves crashing in (Josh took a dive..me--no thanks! too cold! haha)..had lots of warm fires and cooked our food over it..played guitar by the fire under the stars...
we hiked in Fern Canyon--it was like a fairy world!! and we took a 6-mile hike in the beautiful Redwood forest, i felt like i had shrunk!!! While hiking, we prayed that we could be strong, stedfast, enduring like these gigantic, beautiful Redwoods (some were 2,000 years old!!!! WOW!!! without dying!). We wondered, what is the secret of the Redwoods? We found out from reading our handout that they ENTERTWINE THEIR ROOTS to other trees around them, and gather strength from them. GOd spoke to us so powerfully through this!!! Josh and I need each other! Spouses need each other if they want to be strong and enduring!! Also, we need the body of Christ!!
While on the trip, I found myself developing a pattern on submission, love, respect and speaking only words of life over Josh. We talked and reminisced over the good times we've had since knowing each other..I told him why I married him...the real reasons why he's so amazing to me...we were crying...it was beautiful!!
The fruit of all this was wonderful and amazing....Josh told me that it was the best time he's EVER EVER had with me since he's known me!!!! WOW...I only want to grow in this! PTL!!!!
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